Overcoming Perfectionism

I read a book on overcoming fear once and I know that there are many more books out there on overcoming other such weaknesses in order to become a better person. Most are your typical self help books and some even have scripture to back up their ideas and thoughts. All are great I’m sure and the book on fear really helped me out, but I have found an obstacle in my life that desperately needed my attention more, and it’s a contradiction in itself actually, or is it? Overcoming Perfectionism. The idea in our world is to achieve perfectionism, not to overcome it. Sooo..why am I writing about overcoming this so called sought after attribute? Because, not saying that I am perfect or ever was, the pursuit of perfection is the error. God has been revealing to my heart my error of pursuing after being perfect in all that I do, rather than seeking to just please Him, seeking to be in His holiness and His righteousness. I googled perfectionism, curious really, and learned that it is the result of having insecurity, fearing to fail, and fearing the criticism of others, good or bad. It also said that a perfectionist seeks to be critical of others and their work as well. This is where my heart began to sink, because sadly these attributes fit into my heart. I know that I have a tendency to be critical and that tendency I hate. But I need to also learn to hate my constant pursuit of perfectionism. I love accomplishing goals, small or large, and if it has an end and a sense of accomplishment I feel satisfied. The problem is that the work that I am engaged in on a daily basis rarely leaves one feeling that they have accomplished a goal, because the work I am in is a constant work, never having an end until I leave this place. The work that I am in, sharing His gospel, pushes me to rely solely on His strength, to not see my work as goal oriented, but rather people oriented. My work is to love people to Christ, a work that is so fulfilling and at the same time so opposite of my perfectionism tendencies. When I come home at the end of the day, having shared my heart with many locals in my city and perhaps one out of those many listened to my words; then I feel that accomplishment came in the form of having planted a seed. Seeing the harvest of this ground toiling work is seeing first hand a miracle of Him. It’s a miracle simply because it is only His hand that can harvest the fruit and bring salvation. I think that we, as people, want our work to show how much time and energy we have poured into it. But the work of pouring all that energy and strength into lives, where the fruit perhaps will not be seen until years to come, can be exhausting when a perspective towards the work is incorrect. Perfectionism does not fit into the work of God. Perfectionism robs God of His place in my heart for it leaves no room for grace, mercy, patience, compassion, and most of all love. It robs me of the joy of just purely being content with Him doing all the work and me being pulled aside to watch and observe. Perfectionism is a sense of control in my life, and constantly God speaks to my heart asking me to lay my pursuit of perfectionism at His feet. He reminds me that He is God and I am not. When I do not listen to His gentle bidding, then He often speaks more clearly and much more powerfully by stripping me of the ability to work on my own. He does this I know, because He loves me and wants me to simply be a vessel for His use, for His Glory, for His Kingdom. If I am in the way, my work fails. How wonderful to be in a work where what I have seen as my greatest strength is now my worst enemy, thus resulting in Him receiving all the credit for what He is doing through me. Lay down your pursuit of perfectionism, lay down your want of control, lay down your life completely and trust in Him. “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give my all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13:1-3
And if I pursue to be perfect in all I do, forgetting my love for Him and the people, trying to obtain much in my own strength, feeling a sense of control in my life for selfish reasons, then I too, also gain nothing.